A KIND GESTURE

(Originally published Tuesday, July 29, 2008)

While I am very particular about organizing the course of my day, I seldom know to whom I will direct my attention on any given day. Unless I've made specific plans to visit someone whom I know is ill, discouraged, or just needs to talk or hangout, I usually don't know whose path I will cross. I don't wake up every morning trying to determine who will be a recipient of my deed and/or who will reciprocate the gesture. Given that we are all generally affected by the same "highs" and "lows" that touch humanity, I am often prompted by the sadness in someone's eyes, a frail voice, or a crooked smile. However subtle the signs, it's never lost on me how adept we have become at bearing the weights of life so seamlessly. People are important to me. So I keep my antennas up so that I may be sensitive to my surroundings. I try to pay close attention to and engage people with kindness. In my experience, most people, with very few exceptions, welcome a smile or a touch and in turn become conduits of kindness.

I find that a kind gesture is always rewarding, whether or not reciprocity comes in form of red carpets and trumpets. Just doing small acts of kindness and believing that we helped comfort or perhaps assuage someone's fears is quite rewarding. You know that special feeling of gratification you get when you engage and sense that the exchange is good? Those are precious opportunities we experience on this, sometimes-complex, journey through life. And these moments are not restricted to only family and friends. Strangers, as much as close friends, are receptive to kindness. As a friend once noted, "One is not characterized as a kind person because he is that to only one, but because he is that to nearly all." Some people may be unreceptive, and that's fine, but most will be receptive.

Moments like passing up a parking space for someone else's benefit, smiling at the lady who is standing in front of you in the 10-items express line, although she has 35 items in her cart, are opportunities for kindness. (WHOAH... back to the lady on the express line. Do I really want to use that example? Because you know that she both read and chose to ignore the sign). But hey, finding some levity in the situation while we wait distracts us from saying, "Uhggg !@$%^&* Lady!" Oh, these thoughts never cross your mind?

The point is that a kind gesture goes a long way. It's nothing over which we have to toot our horns, but certainly something over which to feel good. Occasionally I'll share an experience with friends in conversation, only to find out that they've had similar experiences. At any rate, as I quiet my day, I'd like to be assured every now and then that I've done something kind or touched someone's heart in a special way. I may have entertained an angel unaware.